Ch-Ch-Ch-Changes.....aka the truth lies in the middle

This last year has been such a change for me. Not knowing up from down, disorientation of the first degree; a great disheartening.

I could once state that I never met a man I didn't like. I held an inate sense of understanding, that all men were as I. At the heart of the matter, most were the product of nature/nuture, which is so out of our control. So we adapt, sometimes maladjust, and just try our best to keep our heads above water.

As a studying young man, seeking a life within the Christian ministry, I wittnessed in some, behavior and character that changed me. Granted. I guess I was growing up. The world is made up of all kinds, right?

When I was overexposed by isocyanate, the company went to great lengths to avoid any responsibility. This was, I believe, the corporate stance. The President and local owner of this division was being put out to pasture. He would have viewed my incident in contrast to what was done. At that very moment, the plans were being put into place. The comapny had a five year life span. A closely guarded secret. They couldn't let my unfortunate fate muck up this plan.

Undergoing a career change and sitting in college wasn't a bad thing. Working within the mental health system had me looking pleasingly at This Being Human..... it was the beauracracy and the shortfall of community mental health and rehabs for the common man that left me frustrated.

In my need for greater financial gain, I re-entered the coatings field via water technology. Water based coatings. Cool stuff. I am pleased to state that I am very happy with what I accomplished. Even within a bigoted, ignorant and machavilian business structure. As the Plant and Laboratory were in the best fighting shape of this branch's life, the salesman brought in no new business, visited week after week, the same list of their biggest customers, came in late - left early mentality, eat on the company dime, stay in the Plant offices for a third to half of the work week, brought us to a complete shut down. The salesmen and the office people are still employed in a smaller building twenty miles south of their former location. The alignment of the President of sales in North Carolina and his two employees in New England unfolded and their carefully crafted parachute had them floating into prosperity while the employees crashed and burned.

Is there a thread here?

When my Mother died, my oldest sister was angry because I did not support her desire to change my parent's decision in making my older brother the executor of their estate. My younger sister (the Christian) emptied the house of all that she could carry home in her Land Rover. My older brother was pissed at the world. It was a ghastley affair. I am not angry with them. Just tired. I no longer see any of them.

.....And this 911 and the Iraq war. If what I mostly believe to be true, IS true.....

Spend some time with these links and see how I really feel!!!!!!!

Yes. I am disheartened.


Rowan said…
u r allowed to be :) cheer up.