The Path of no path?

I have to admit, I am feeling the stress. And, if I were to review with you, step by step, all of the bullshit that life has and continues to hand me, you'd say I have every right to be stressed. But the "right" to feel stressed is not an issue for me. Homeostasis is. I have always found it - without looking for it; when I have been able to be commited to one thing. My daily meditation.
As I've discussed, problems that have complicated any reasonable schedule continued to plague. Then I lost my job. Although it was repeatedly denied by upper management, I saw it coming. My intuition accurately predicted the transition until it was almost scarey. So the company downsized from manufacturing to a distribution center and my services as Plant Manager were no longer needed. That's okay, I thought. I will have time to get up early, write my book, meditate, exercise......maybe even paint all the rooms in the house!
But alas, I have stayed up late, get up late, have drank too much, and my book has been growing ever so slowly.
I guess the only success I can claim is that on 2/15 I started to eat better and lost 3 lbs in a week. On 3/1 I will weigh in again. I'm not beating myself up for the not getting up early too bad. Its winter. My most difficult time of the year. In my twenties, I would gain 10lbs and lose it in early summer. Now, I have to work at it. Better not to gain the 10 lbs at all. Period!
I am confident that once I get under 180lbs, I will have more energy. I want to join the gym. It would be a first. I have equipment at home but its in my New England cellar w/o heat. At fifty, I need heat, Dammit!!!
By summer, I will be buff n' tuff.........Meditating daily....and hopfully reemployed.

Comments