Wouldn't it be nice......(?)......

......if you could tune in and find some pearls of wisdom?
......find something uplifting?
......enter the Tao?

It is getting interesting. I am not being apathetic. I am just realizing my lack of control over the rush of negative events.

I look at over 1,000 jobs per week. I suppose that at 51, ( a rather handsome 51, I might add) I could sell my home and relocate. I'm just not built that way. My grandkids are here, my roots, as shallow as they are, are here. So, I worked twelve hours overtime and it added only $100 to my take home pay. I had to borrow $20 to pay my mortgage leaving me with nothing for groceries or gas. In one week they are canceling my house and car insurance. I have a meager amount in a 401K. I am rolling over into a IRA and taking $2000 to bail me out. It will not be here in time. I can't pare down any more than I have. I have the computer because my youngest in in college and it is required.

Meanwhile, my oldest son, who has worn me out with his heroin addiction and bi polar disorder, is in trouble again. He is once again in over his head and is most likely going to perish. I have done all that I could do. I have bailed him out in an educational fashion time and time again. (See, this and this equal this. If you do this, this is what happens. I can only do this and this is what you must do)

Meanwhile...at the True Value store, I am taking over as the paint manager. I have an excellent color eye. A spectrophotometer, that measures color and assigns numerical values, is essential when it comes to approving color specifications. In my last position, my spectro was obsolete for two thirds of the year. I approved all colors by eye without one rejection. When it come to hardware stores, it is not as simple. Customers don't understand that colors will change depending on the light source. They don't understand that the dispensers are limited. Customers can be fickle. The contractors are more knowledgable.
But hey......we'll see where it all goes....

Comments

Anonymous said…
wow, interesting about the color thing. you're a human machine! woo! control, control, control. it's human i guess and one of the hardest things to let go of. what would you do with your life if you had a choice? because you do.
Loralee Choate said…
I'm just checking in on my rain-drenched friend.

Hope things are looking up, or if not, that they haven't gotten worse.

Chin up, Guiness-Meister
:)
Rowan said…
wanna select some colour matching for me? I'm not fussy, really!

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