Gnawing, gnawing, gnawing,
at the perception
of myself.
If I do this;
I will improve.
If I do this;
I will be somebody.
I have to achieve,
believe,
concieve of a me
that is better
than the man I am.

.....Does the crow live in this way?

.....Does the fish look to grow legs?

Nay, but they are not human, you say.
It is we who have the burden, the need to
improve, to grow, to attain.

But I say, that is a misrepresentation
pointed at by the prophets and sages,
and too often the pointing finger has been
mistaken for the moon,
the river, once crossed, has us
leaving the canoe on the bank.
How often is the river crossed
and the canoe blinds our view
because we unwittingly refuse
to drop it.

Be still.
Watch.
Judge not.
Practice.
Be still.
Watch.
Judge not.
Practice.

Comments

De.vile said…
Dont you fear going wrong?
Tim said…
going....wrong? In what manner, I ask? Are you asking from a Christian perspective? I spent many years as a Christian and was once licensed as a "Minister" of the gospel. I would expect that your question emanates from there just from you using the word, "wrong".
I fully believe as Jesus taught, that the yoke is easy and the burden light. Where in the Christian experience, as it is being presented, does it feel easy and light? Instead, you gnaw away at yourself and focus on how often we fall short of the glory of God....and that IS the point. The grace offered by him crucified presents the age old paradox....you no longer need to struggle to be "right" as opposed to "wrong" but you continue to feel the need to do so.
Be still,
Watch
Judge not,
practice.
Does it get any more Christain than that?
capegirl said…
i am nowhere near this level of self-acceptance. i think it has plenty to do with having a very domineering and judgemental father - but i do not blame the man. only i know i have much to become less and more aware of....