The point being that you should persevere.The bad will become good again. And when it's good, it is great!
But sometimes, I do have to admit, working on a marriage can make you feel like Sisyphus. forever doomed to endless labor. And I have found that I cannot push anymore. The rock is beginning roll right back over me. And Christ! I did not know that it would hurt this bad.
And what I find particularly interesting is the level of grief that I feel over seeing my wife suffer so.
I want to spare her. To save her. To make everything all right for her. And she is right there with me! She too is grieving over what she feels. She wants me to spare her, to save her. To make everything all right. And therein lies the rub. The catch. The cornerstone of the entire marriage; she is the perpetual victim.
And I can't fix that. I cannot save her from that. I cannot be responsible for her happiness and security every moment of every day.
I just can't.