The inability to express esoteric concepts...

...using mundane speech. This Being Human....

Throughout all of recorded religious history, God has been thought of in terms of being "The Creator". In the most ancient and primitive of religions, God was thought of in terms of both polytheism and monotheism, being that creation needed both seed and womb. Perhaps this is also being reflected in Genesis 1: 26/27 "God said, let us make man in our own image after our likeness...So God created man in his own image...male and female created he them".

It's interesting to note that most of the major religions contain the concept of God that reflects what could loosely be described as a trinity. Christians speak of Father, Son and Holy Ghost; The blessed Trinity.

Hindu (Trimurti) Brahma, Vishnu, and Siva.

The Tao De Ching says, "Tao gave birth to one, one gave birth to two, two gave birth to three, three gave birth to all myriad things". And in Mahayana Buddhism one can find the Sanskrit "Trikaya", meaning that the Buddha manifests himself in three bodies;

Only Islam appears to stand firm on the "Oneness of God" from whom all creation and life is derived. This was Mohammed's mission. The Koran contains the "ninety nine names of God" but stresses that God's essence and qualities are contained in the names but God is still "One".

The concept, idea, belief or thoughts regarding "God" is as old as recorded history. Although Buddhism and Taoism has been labeled by many (including many Buddhists and Taoists) as being atheist in nature, this is just not true. In Buddhism, the question is often put forth but is just as often put aside, as it does not fit into the teaching of "Suffering and the end of suffering" as prescribed by the Buddha. The Buddha said,
"Gripped by fear men go to the sacred mountains,sacred groves, sacred trees and shrines". Fear is suffering. In that Buddhism is about freedom, (free from suffering) a Buddhist is free to believe or not to believe in God. Any Buddhist looking to convince another Buddhist about the nonexistence of God is either creating suffering or is thinking themselves superior. It is just not important. Being free from suffering is.

So what does any of this have to do with Freemasonry?

Vehicles, cont'd......

Even before the introduction of the wheel there were all manner of boats, rafts and animals moving humans to and fro. Vehicles, ever evolving from cart to wagon, from horseless carriage to Porshe, the flight of Orville, (only a little more than one hundred years ago) to the age of space flight and our landing on the moon; All, it can be stated, have no importance one over the other. They are our construct to improve that of our first simple vehicle - Our feet! - transportation of the simplest kind.

Likewise, contained within the minds of This Being Human.... there have been almost countless vehicles of religion and philosophy. Limiting our scope of knowledge to the vehicle of Christianity, Islam, Buddhist and Hindu, and the handful of other vehicles of which we have heard from the nightly news or from television, is to grossly underestimate This Being Human.....

From the earliest days the Indian Vedas, the Greek sage Zoroaster, the teachings of Buddhism and Taoism, the introduction Hebrew mono-theism, Plato to Aristotle and Socrates; We can add the philosophy of Duns Scotus, of Nietzsche, and yes, that of L. Ron Hubbard. The list of vehicles available for transport is endless. All, it can be stated, have no importance over the other. They are our construct to improve that of another of our first simple vehicles, our breath!

When you sweep away all belief, dogma and construct, and when you focus on the vehicle of breath, you find something that has been hidden in a haze. Or as in the words of the dazed fish who asked, "Where's the water?"as he swam in diligent search for it.

In the breath we discover Chi (literally "breath," "vapor," or "air") In Hebrew, the word "Ruach" means breath of life and in Sanskrit it is called Prana. I find that the farther we get from the simplicity and the power of the breath, the farther we will find ourselves from God, the Tao or the divine spark within.

With the combination of walking and breathing, life is never more clear and more simple. Oh, how we have complicated our lives by our efforts to improve it. Sometimes it would appear that there are never really improvements, just changes;

So what does any of this have to do with Freemasonry?

Vehicle

The First Noble Truth, as explained by the Buddha - is that life is suffering. To live, you must suffer. It is impossible to live without experiencing some kind of suffering. We have to endure physical suffering like sickness, injury, tiredness, old age and eventually death. We endure psychological suffering like loneliness, frustrations, fear, embarrassment, disappointment, anger, etc...
The Second Noble Truth is that all suffering is caused by craving. In other words, we are in a constant state of want; searching, in the belief that in obtaining we will find ourselves content.

I think that any simple examination of these truths will validate their truthfulness. This, is believe is the root of religion. The quest for salvation.

The Buddha prescribed an eightfold path by which in following, you could bring about an end to suffering. These are the teachings of Buddhism. Suffering and the end of suffering.

Buddhism is but one vehicle that is constructed for the purpose of helping us transcend This Being Human.... and conveying us to the distant shore that is beyond understanding.

As conveyed by Ramana Maharshi "All the scriptures are meant only to make a man retrace his steps to his original source. He need not acquire anything new. He only has to give up false ideas and useless accretions. Instead of doing this, however, he tries to grasp something strange and mysterious because he believes his happiness lies elsewhere. That is the mistake."

An Armada of vehicles, constructed in the effort of leading us back towards our original source, the Buddha within, the Kingdom of God within us... and in usual fashion, This Being Human.... we begin to compare, look aside, hold disdain or even covet anther's vehicle.

Sri Aurobindo says,
"Each religion has helped mankind. Paganism increased in man the light of beauty, the largeness and height of his life, his aim at a many-sided perfection; Christianity gave him some vision of divine love and charity; Buddhism has shown him a noble way to be wiser, gentler, purer; Judaism and Islam how to be religiously faithful in action and zealously devoted to God; Hinduism has opened to him the largest and profoundest spiritual possibilities. A great thing would be done if these God-visions could embrace and cast themselves into each other; but intellectual dogma and cult-egoism stand in the way."

And this leads me to on to discuss in brief, one other vehicle, less known, wrapped in mystery. The Freemasons.

To be continued...................

Buddha at the altar......

Porcelain & Jade collection with added resin pieces

Not nearly the photographer that James is, but here I present the Buddha with two styles of Quan Yin on either side in the background. Directly behind lies a laughing Buddha with hands raised.

The Buddha that welcomes at my door

Quan Yin in various forms

....in my upcoming posts I plan on fulfilling two promises....share some photos with James and tell Don & Mark a little about the Freemasons.

Hope that all have had a very happy Thanksgiving! Or if in Canada, the UK, India or in South Africa.....as some of my blog friends are outside of the USA, I wish you a great hug....a low bow; and one of you, a slow kiss!!!!!!

Separatists & Thanksgiving....

I have so often heard the tale about America being a "Christian Nation." The story always begins with the arrival of the Pilgrims on the shores of Massachusetts. The story is furthered by the belief that the writers of the Declaration of Independence and that the founders of the Constitution were Christians who claimed this land for the glory of God.
Although it is true that the founding of the American colonies found their motivation through their quest for religious freedom, it was readily apparent that this freedom should also allow for diversity in belief. As the Church of England sought deliverance from the Papacy, the Separatists sought freedom from the church of England. Roger Williams fled the Separatists for religious freedom in Rhode Island while the Quakers found solace in Pennsylvania. It all comes full circle as the Catholics found freedom from all the Protestants in Maryland.
The sticking point of all this is that each sect thought of the other as being wrong. (the more things change the more they stay the same) Not unlike the King of England or the Pope in Rome, they had a desire to establish their form of belief as the standard by which all men should live.
The founding fathers kept this problem in mind when they wrote, "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances," as it was this very form of suppression that created the Separatists in England over one hundred and fifty years earlier! http://caselaw.lp.findlaw.com/data/constitution/amendment01/01.html#1
I find it comical when the Christians of this today cite the Pilgrims as being their roots in America. The separatists would not have recognized those that now hang their hats of the cross of Jesus. Christmas and Easter? Entirely pagan!
But we'll let them off the hook with Thanksgiving.
Based on the English Isles tradition of Harvest Home, it was a time to give thanks for a good harvest. Although reflective of the Celts Autumnal Equinox, English peasantry found it easier to set a yearly date for their exactness on the signs of heaven was less than exact than those of their unchristian ancestors. Harvest Home was held on September 25Th and was both a time of Thanksgiving and a time of ceasing from labor while allowing an abundance of food and drink with friends and family. The Pilgrims continued the tradition in Plymouth with over ninety Indians in attendance.
Can you imagine the Pilgrims amazement at their first face to face Indian encounter? As he approached, meeting the Pilgrims with their muskets in tow, he spoke to them in English! My, my......

On Death & Dying....and This Being Human

There are five stages, according to Dr. Elizabeth Kubler-Koss, that a terminally ill person goes through denial, anger, bargaining, depression and ultimately, acceptance.
This has always stuck with as it seemed to be a healthy and deep construct much like the Buddha's four noble truths and the eightfold path.
It has been said, again much like the eightfold path, that the steps are not always in order. However, the steps are there to be crossed anyway.
I have found, much to my chagrin, that suffering also follows the same pathway.
As a Leo, a proud man, one that has been labeled by some as arrogant and by others as humble; a mixture of man and spirit (Prana - Breathe) I don't lie down easily.
Acceptance. A deep and abiding rest in what truly is. The word and the definition does not do the experience justice. To be free from suffering; enlightenment. It does not mean absence of pain, or debt or loss. It means a transcendence beyond pain, debt or loss.
I am so often amazed, angered and ashamed at my response to difficult times.
I am happy to report that the Turkey Raffle went well and that my Beef Stew was labeled, "The best that the club has ever had." I am also very happy to report that I did not win the giant Lobster. Pete did. He has always dreamed of winning it. He dreams for it as much as a kid dreams for his favorite toy at Christmas. They had asked his wife to draw a name for the door prize (an 8Lb Lobster) and she came out with his name. It was a classic moment. Pete and his wife beamed with joy. I felt such joy at their happiness.
I left a picture on blogger for James & Mark to see. I also deleted it. I instead left a picture with me and "The Little Hottie" my 1973 Karmann Ghia. (the year I graduated high school) Too old for the likes of another little hottie, Capegirl!!! LOL

This Being Human..............

Okay Mark and James...here I is! Scary stuff, eh?

In New England, it is tradition around this time of the year, to hold Turkey Raffles. It's a way for all the local organizations to raise money. The Fire Department, schools, American Legion and all the Social Clubs will fill to the brim as people gather to get, "three spins for a buck." Although there are several variations, the standard practice is to spin a numbered wheel. If the number matches your ticket, you win the prize. First spin is usually a turkey, or a roast or a pork loin. Second spin may be a bottle or a bag of potatos, and third, a kilbasa or such.

Tonight, I will help prepare two large pots of beef stew for tomorrow's raffle at my sportman's club. (Beagle club) Me and Pete will begin late this afternoon with all the dicing and chopping and cooking. I am the tatste-master, approving the final result. On Friday night, we will reheat and serve, for free, until it is all gone. I get a free turkey for this, but I get much more....

I love to cook, to create. I like Pete's company. He's a little, hardworking, good hearted, scrapper of a Frenchman. (Canadian) We have performed this role for many years now and I know that he looks forward to it as much as I do. Serving from our kitchen window is fun. We also put out a tip jar and buy raffle tickets from any money we receieve. Last year, I won a five pound live lobster. I took it home and cooked it the tradional New England way; by tossing it into a pot of boiling water. Let's just say that next time, I will give it away. I don't have the heart to do that twice..

We are having unseasonably warm weather. I am equipped to heat with all wood but I have less than a cord. I have yet to turn on the oil heat. I love the heat from wood. The smell of wood smoke on a winter night. Oil is at an all time high. I'm digging around looking for free wood wherever I can. My fraternity of Freemasons has it at $30 a cord if I go retrieve and cut myself, from behind the lodge. Thirty dollars isn't much but it is still hard to come by. And the time.....and my twisted spine...Oooooo, the misery!!! LOL....I'll let you know how it goes.

Tao & Zen

....When I began this blog, it was titled
"Tao1776 Tao & Zen...A little rain must fall."
My inspiring concept was based on the teachings and experiences within Taoist practice and that of an even more limited experience with Zen.
You see, I was introduced to Taoism when in the midst of pain and monetary suffering greater than that of which I am now experiencing. In time, as my practice developed and my faith deepened in my practice, my role as a manager grew, and so did my wallet. With greater responsibility and dedication to the job, my practice suffered and balance wained. My practiced diminished. I still maintained a good degree of insight and a sense of faith in awareness. This was helpful as I watched the local division falter and position me and my crew out of our jobs.

This WAS the "little rain that must fall."

As my finances drained away, drinking increased. Practice stopped. Jobs were no where to found. I took refuge in a book I was writing entitled, "Walking the Circle." I felt like Hemingway. No really. Not a good thing!

I have struggled to find my way again (whatever that means) until everything has become an undecided haze. This Being Human...gave me solace. ...This being human is a guesthouse. Every morning a new arrival. A joy, a depression, a meanness. Some momentary awareness comes as an unexpected visitor. Welcome and entertain them all! Even if they're a crowd of sorrows who violently sweep your house empty of its furniture. Still, treat each guest honorably, he may be clearing you out for some new delight...
I often think of the complaining Jews that wandered for forty years in the desert that never saw the promised land. No faith, no trust, just complaints.
I vacillate between confidence and insecurity. How will I ever manage the house through winter? However will I pay my bills? Finances have been cut as far back as possible, I believe. My youngest, (still at home) is a junior in college and must have the computer for home. We have spent less than $150 in groceries in the past month. Poverty invites too many carbohydrates which is bad for a diabetic.
How can I maintain faith and trust? I can. I know a fraction of the suffering in the world. How can I possibly feel poorly when I indeed have so much?
I am working on it. Sloth and torpor are my greatest hindrance. Too great a high and low in blood sugar adds to it. Stress adds to it. Increased depression adds to it.
How often man seeks to build for the future all the while dismantling it?

...The Almanac predicted snow in early to mid November and I sat watching the rain in mid fifty degree temperatures. The trees are almost completely barren except for the few pines that stab brazenly at the sky.
...Wu Wei asked, "Are we not wasps who spend all day in a fruitless attempt to traverse a window-pane - while the other half of the window is wide open?"
...I sat smoking my pipe with a full belly while contemplating post replies and personal e mails from fellow bloggers, mentors and friends. The Lady often tells me that I should begin a gratitude journal. As I sit, watching the rain flood over the road and nourish the earth around me, there is surely much to be thankful for. As said by Wu Wei, "Living should be perpetual and universal benediction."
I thank you, my friends for your encouraging words. I thank you for your understanding and your lack of judgement.
Peace be unto you.
Namaste.

Tim

Disassociation

For those of you who may be familiar with Latin or those of you that have known me through my blog since it's inception in early 2005, "A fictional iter itineris" began on my blog of 9/19/06.

A stick in the mud is a point of avoidance; giving a wide berth, for in so doing, you can avoid getting shit on your shoes. I have become that stick. Perhaps I should be pleased by my service but no one really enjoys being stuck in shit, now do they?

I have become increasingly dis-associative; hence my semi fictional account of the cabin, of Earle, and of my long hike in the wood. Although rooted in truth and in characterizations of people that I truly know, the stories are a fictional account of my current struggles with tough financial times, ongoing problems of health, deep spiritual conflict, and a family tree aflame with depression.

I am a shell of my former self. I was a poor steward of my money when I had it. Depression is so clearly genetic. Especially when you examine my family tree. My health problems further deepens the depression. It's sad that I cannot receive herbs and accupunture without having a fat wallet. It's a shame that even spiritual instruction comes with a price.

I need help. Or I need awareness. I'm just tired, uninspired, beat up and desperate.

Mark, I need that Tonglen. I do.

Hand, out stretched

seeking comfort

seeking aid.

A few words,

a gentle word;

while secretly

wishing I could

heal.

Not wanting to

wittness the pull

of illness closer

towards

death's door.

........To be quite honest with you, I wish that I could introduce to you a high degree of levity; or perhaps make you laugh. Some of the most memorable people that I have known have been those that live life with a smile. It's not that life has been a bed of roses for them. They have an inate ability to flow and I envy that. Things have always been too complex for me. I have seen too much suffering. I have often wondered about karma, the sins of the fathers, about inescapable fate. I am sure that there is a place, a place of enlightenment, homeostasis, a place of wisdom, compassison and balance.

My friend James spoke of the burning off of negative karma. How hot does the fire need to be?

I cannot breathe.

It is interesting to look at the constructs we assemble in an attempt to define ourselves in our mind's eye. James, in his wisdom, reminded me of the "middle way". His point held more credence than my belief that I, needed to walk the long and rugged trail back to the cabin. That I ever walked such a long and difficult trail with such intent, James reminded me, has no gain or loss in walking or catching a ride to the cabin door. Especially as I walked with the intent of being an ascetic, as though my difficulty proved something. With an already beat up body, in a daily battle with pain, why would I not accept a ride? If I was walking for exercise, or to commune with nature (and to a degree, I was) then things might be different. But I strapped on the labor of the long hike not, as it were in union with the world about me but as if in suffering I might find myself.

Why indeed?

With a F150 and a Suzuki Quad in tow, I was back at the cabin in less time than it took to cook my rice and sweet potatoes which James and I devoured in still less time.

My purpose is to learn a little about what makes this, what I call "me", tick. A Taoist proverb states that if we desire to help the world, we must begin with helping our country; if we desire to help our country, we must first start with helping our community; if we want to help the community, we must begin with helping our family; if we want to help our family, we must begin with ourselves.

This brought to mind the fall of the Evangelical from Colorado who resigned after allegations of a homosexual prostitute and a drug buy of methamphetamine. Sad, that a man responsible for being a moral compass for a congregation of 14,000 and a leader of the National Association of Evangelicals with membership of 30 million, and an advocate of banning all same sex unions, was so out of touch with his own ticking.

But Buddhism or Taoism isn't about building a new model of ourselves as if we are broken. Many religions, based on their culture and convention of thought, all say the same thing. They just say it differently. The whole point of "grace"as taught by Jesus, when held up to the scrutiny of the "law", is that we are what we are. We are complex, sometimes difficult, This Being Human....we are called to liberty; not licence. We hold each other up with compassion, we don't look for rocks to throw at one another.

With that thought Earle arrived at the door inviting me to his home for some seafood "chowda". He recognized the worried look upon my face and announced, "Don't you worry. The truck is off the number twelve fire line on the lumber road. It'll take us thirty minutes to get home".

I could have cried. In some strange way, his arrival by truck seemed to confirm that my ride home was all right. Imagine. Locked up tight into my mind was some moral play about whether it was "good or bad" regarding my decision to ride back to my hermitage.

The chowder was delicious. The conversation equally so. The wood stove was in full blaze as the outside temperature was in the low twenties. Inside it had to be around ninety. Earle looked comfortable. I was starting to become well done. Interesting home, all lined with sign of hunting, wildlife, family. The bathroom reminded me of that of my grand-parents who were once woodsman in the New Hampshire hills where several of my aunts and uncles were delivered and led out on liters. The shelves over the toilet were packed tightly with old aftershaves, ointments, powders; rubbing alcohol, witch hazel and items that fall beyond description. The living area was filled with dark pine walls and a long line of cordwood running along the south wall.

I didn't ask to spend the night and Earle didn't offer. When we parted, with me and my light at the bottom of the cart road leading to my abode, Earle offered an embrace and a hug. "You're like a brother to me, Tim".

I returned the affection, for I too recognized a kindred spirit. I slept well.

As a family, we have gravitated towards holidays and celebrations that reflect our heritage and our beliefs. All Hallows Eve is a time of gathering and we oblige. The family gets together along with a few close friends and we eat some our favorite foods and toast the good times of summer past while greeting the darkness of winter.

My day of departure for the long walk home was marked by downpours of Noah-like proportions. I decided to spend Saturday inside and to mark Sunday as the day for my departure. Sunday morning came with a steady wind of twenty to thirty mph and gusts up to fifty. I can barely recall a more windy day. It was awesome to witness but I was fearful of walking the wood in such a wind. The trail would be wet and a hazard to walk on. There are stories of "widow makers" - trees that fall on unsuspecting woodsman ending our already short lives. I decided that Monday would be a better day.

Monday arrived with a blazing sun and temperatures that rose to the sixty degree mark. I contemplated taking the off road trail down to the logging road in hopes that I would be fortunate enough to find a ride by a local hunter. If I wasn't as fortunate, it would add five hours and many more miles to my trek homeward. Knowing that I would only be staying a few days at home and returning to my winter's retreat, I decided that this decision would be the better of the two choices and I headed for the logging road.

Needless to say, I arrived at the old railroad bed leading towards home many hours later than expected. No ride came for me. My legs were heavy and ached like those of a marathon runner. I felt my anticipation grow. My heart skipped a beat as I saw my house. I paced my breath with the rhythm of my stride and marched forward. There were several cars in the drive but the fast approaching darkness made their identification difficult. I didn't see my daughter's car and I felt a surge of panic. I so wanted. nay, needed to see my beloved granddaughter; the Dingo. I knew in that instant of my attachment to this little girl. The one that always wanted me to show her the moon. "Hi moon. Hi stars," she would say. "Goodnight moon."

At the end of the drive my eyes adjusted and the car was there. As I arrived, there she was. Happy to see me. "Go see the moon," she said with arms stretching foward for me to pick her up.

We did.